InsaneJournal

FIC: The Death of a Soul Chapter 28
Title: The Death of a Soul
Author: roedhunt
Pairing(s): HP/SS
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Every choice and decision in Harry’s life has been made by the wizarding world. Now the only thing he has had control over - his freedom - is threatened. Will Harry succumb to this new challenge as he usually does or will he finally stand up and fight? … Because there is only so much a man can take before his soul dies.


Highlight for Warnings: * Non-consensual sex in a forced male/male relationship, first time, hurt/no comfort accepted. HET in chapters One and Two. *
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers …No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Acknowledgements:
To: silentauror, lemonade8, lsr, swanpride, annephoenix, ironhide, and political_poet. Thank you for all of the excellent advice you gave me!
To: magic_helmet. Words can’t say thank you enough for making sure I didn’t stray away from my original plotline! And a huge thank you for the absolutely wonderful icon you made me! *super big huggie*


Chapter Twenty Eight


When he had awoke this morning, Harry somehow knew that this day was going to be different from all the other torturous days he had had to endure since that fateful morning of being told of the Life-Debt. Harry knew something just as bad - if not worse - was going to happen to him. It suddenly occurred to Harry that this feeling of ‘knowing’ reminded him of someone else and how she had known that something terrible was going to happen between them.

And like Ginny Weasley, Harry didn’t know how he knew this – he just knew. He could feel it.


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


As soon as Harry had slammed the bedroom door behind him, he saw a small movement out of the corner of his eye. He spun his head towards the hovering broom, and then proceeded to storm out of his quarters without giving it a second glance. He barely heard the thousand pieces of wood exploding in mid-air. In fact, Harry was so blinded by hatred and anger, that he never even noticed the way passing students had cowered against the dungeon walls or the ones who had looked away just so they wouldn’t have to meet his piercing glare. Of course Harry wouldn’t have seen them. His mind was lost and spinning out of control. This day was becoming the worst day of his life and it was only mid-afternoon.

Trying to sort out his thoughts, Harry began the long journey of climbing up the marble staircase. He had to calm down or he’d go mad. Half-way up, his plan worked. Harry replayed the events that had already occurred today in his head. Ron’s icy stare and his cold words. Hermione’s shocked expression when Harry had sneered at her. The fist that had struck him so fast and so hard that he had fallen to the ground almost the instant it was given. The scream of sheer terror that came from Hermione as he looked down his wand, aimed straight at Ron’s forehead.

But none of it, none of it, was as traumatic as the biting words he had heard next.

“Is Snape still training you, or is Voldemort?”

Those eight words alone had pierced Harry straight through his heart. His fury was replaced with another powerful emotion. Absolute fear. Fear of himself. Harry blinked and had stood there frozen in time as those words sank deep into the depths of his soul.

His body refused to move at first, but then slowly, ever so slowly, Harry took a step back. Then another. Then another. Harry ran. He ran away so fast from his two best friends that he didn’t even realise that he had entered the forbidden forest till it was too late. Harry stumbled and fell over tree trunks, bushes and rocks and had bruised several parts of his anatomy as he smacked into several trees. Incapable of taking another step, Harry finally collapsed against the closest tree and tumbled to the ground. He pulled his legs into his chest, tucked his head between his folded arms and tried to make him disappear from the face of the earth.

It was the sound of crackling leaves that had pulled Harry back to the present. He didn’t have to look up to know who it was, but instinctively, Harry jumped to his feet, wand drawn. Draco Malfoy stood before him with his wand out, pointing straight at Harry’s heart. At first Harry was furious that the blond had followed him, but with a brief exchange of words, Harry no longer cared. He didn’t care about anything at that point. He just wanted his life to be over and done with.

For some odd reason that didn’t sit well with Malfoy.

“You know Potter, the only one who’s abandoned you is you… Just what the fuck are you going to do when all of this is over? Crawl under a rock and hide like the coward you are?”

That hit Harry hard. Even harder than Ron’s cold query.

“Did you have to let it destroy who you are in the process?”

Harry had to pause on the staircase and his knees gave out. He sat there staring absently at the moving stairs below.

“I don’t even care if I live or die! In fact I honestly wish that Voldemort was here right now so he could hurry up and end my pathetic life!”

Harry shuddered, remembering. He really didn’t care.

“Everyone forgot that I was in love... It was like she never even existed… I loved her so much.”

Harry’s glasses began to slide down his face so he removed them and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

“I loved her so much.”

That was the first time Harry spoke of Ginny Weasley - and his love for her. He had revealed his deepest secret to the one person that he thought cared the least for him - Draco Malfoy, the son of a Death Eater and his long-time rival. For a brief instant, Harry welcomed the idea that Malfoy was secretly working for Voldemort and that his miserable life would soon be over. But in only one gesture of a comforting arm, Harry knew his confession wasn’t a regretful one.

Malfoy had calmed Harry down with soft words of reassurance and instead of repelling against Malfoy and his intimate embrace, a warm genuine feeling of tenderness and security swept over Harry. He knew it wasn’t love, far from it in fact, but the power of compassion from the other boy was there nonetheless and he allowed himself to be pulled for a tight coddle. There was something familiar about this. Something Harry couldn’t place.

Nothing, save Harry and Draco Malfoy, existed in the forbidden forest and Harry, for the first time, felt the heavy burden that had been sitting on his shoulders lifted. Instinctively, Harry leant into the young wizard and gently pressed his cheek against Malfoy’s. Harry’s lips caressed Draco's jaw until he slowly brought them forward to a soft and compliant mouth. Harry could feel the blond’s breath against his own and anxiously awaited for some sort of response.

What Harry didn’t expect was to be pushed away… Harry was rejected.

Harry had meant it to only be a caring and an innocent kiss. He had poured his heart out to Malfoy, accepted his warm and caring touch of comfort, and in return he was turned away. But why? What had he done wrong? Didn’t Malfoy feel the same energy that had passed between them? He acted as if nothing had happened between the two of them and then left him standing outside the Quidditch changing room. Whether it was the Gryffindor or the Slytherin in Harry, he was determined to find out why.

Inside, standing in front of a furious Draco Malfoy, he was hit with the harsh reality.

“What the fuck don’t you understand, Potter? You’re married! Do you understand that? You're fucking married! Maybe that doesn’t bother you, but it does me!”

Harry’s face flushed crimson as he remembered. And now that he was finally able to look back, Harry wondered why it was so important to him to confront Malfoy. Harry wasn’t gay – so why did he try to kiss Malfoy? Why did he feel compelled to look at Malfoy’s nakedness? Harry couldn’t stand looking at his own husband’s body, so why did it feel different when he looked at Malfoy's? Perhaps he was just appalled at the fact that it was his husband’s body and not per se' a male’s body… Perhaps.

“And don’t ever come near me again.”

Harry closed his eyes tightly as those words tore at his heart, remembering just how the blond had begged him to leave. He had toyed with Malfoy's emotions - brought upon by his own selfishness.

The sounds of the boy’s cries of anguish still echoed in Harry's soul.

Harry slowly pulled himself to his feet and started back up the stairs. His legs were just as unsteady as his emotions, but he had to keep moving. He didn’t know why, only that he had to.

“Please, Harry. Let me help you. Talk to me. Tell me what's going on. Tell me what you want.”

Harry's muscles seized. His fingers gripped the banister.

“Tell me what you want.”

Harry didn’t tell Snape what he wanted – he showed him. He showed him in the most brutal way. Harry would have never imagined himself to be that cruel. That heartless.

“Did you have to let it destroy who you are in the process?”

Harry spun around and raced down the staircase so fast that his legs were but a blur. He knew what he had to do now. He had to destroy the one thing that would set him free.

Himself … Or Voldemort.


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Severus felt it first. It was a powerful surge of energy and it seemed like it shook the entire castle. Snape bolted from the dungeons just as another bout of energy erupted. He closed his eyes, trying to find the location. The fourth floor.

Snape ran as fast as a young, agile youth would have. He had to get to Harry before anyone else could. Barely out of breath, he reached the fourth floor and stopped to listen. He was so close but he heard nothing but the sound of his pounding heart.

BOOM!

Snape stumbled backwards from being so close to the shock wave. He quickly regained his bearings, and started banging on the wall.

“Harry, damn you! What are you doing? Let me in!”

BOOM!

Snape caught himself this time before falling. He screamed louder.

“You ignorant child! What the bloody hell are you trying to prove? Just how insane you are?”

The wall opened up and Severus flew forward and landed on his hands and knees. Gingerly, he stood and keeping his composure, calmly brushed off the dirt that came from the filthy floor. He didn’t want to appear to be more scared than he actually was. As he waved the dust from his face, he looked around the large room. Pieces of dead animals was scattered everywhere and blood drizzled down the walls. His eyes finally landed on Harry.

Harry was standing in the corner, wand gripped tightly. His face was pale and his expression was neutral save the pressed-thin lips. Harry’s body was as still as a statuette. Snape narrowed his eyes confused, and took a step towards him. In a flash of an eye, Severus was slammed against the wall.

Shaking off the curse, Snape looked over at Harry. The boy hadn't moved.

“You said I couldn’t hurt you,” Harry said flatly. “You lied.”

“Harry, I …”

SLAM!

“Damn it, Harry! Will you stop?” Snape cried as he pushed himself away from the wall.

“Admit it. You lied.”

“I didn’t lie! It was our wedding day and…”

SLAM!

Snape slid down the wall, coughing.

“So,” Harry began slowly. “We were unable to hurt each other because it was our wedding day? Is that right?”

Snape winced, anticipating another curse, but then nodded when none came.

“I see,” Harry drawled. “So if I really wanted to, I could kill you now.”

Severus’ eyes widened and for an instant, looked at Harry in horror. “You… you wouldn’t,” he said, lowering his voice to hide his uncertainty.

A dark smile of amusement crossed Harry’s lips and his eyes twinkled, though he said nothing. Blinking once, Harry looked away and motioned around the room.

“Like it? I think I’m ready.” He spun back around to Snape who was now leaning on the wall, holding his ribs. “What do you think?”

Snape sneered at him. “I think you're mad.”

Harry pressed the tip of his wand under his chin and looked at the ceiling. “Hmm. You may be right.” He looked back over to Snape. “But I still think I’m ready.” He grinned wickedly. “Want to test me?”

Snape nodded once. With a mere flick of the man’s wrist, everything vanished. Harry arched a brow.

“Impressive.”

“You're not the only one whose powers have excelled,” Snape smirked, now standing tall and rigid.

“Well then. Shall we?”

No sooner than the words had left Harry's mouth that they both cried, “EXPELLIARMUS!”

The curse ricochetted off each other and within a moment’s breath, the once vacant room was filled with barriers that they could shield themselves behind. More disarming spells were tried before switching to the more powerful and complex ones. Bolts of red streams of light filled the air, along with bright violet sparks that rained down from the ceiling.

Harry maneuvered between obstacles, trying to find the ‘perfect shot’, but Snape was too quick for that. He had anticipated Harry’s moves and deflected each of his curses with ease. Finally, a loud of “EVANESCO” was heard and the statuette Harry was hiding behind vanished, leaving Harry unprotected and vulnerable.

“PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!”

Harry fell to the floor with a thud, arm raised in mid-motion for his next spell. Snape straighten and began circling his prone husband.

“So, Potter,” he said with an amused sneer. “Ready to do battle with the Dark Lord, are you? Believe that you are such a powerful wizard that you can do it on your own? May I remind you what happened the last time you had illusions of grandeur?”

Though Harry’s body was frozen, an enormous fire raged through his veins as he listened to Snape taunt him.

Snape crouched down beside him. “There you were, standing in the open field, facing Voldemort. Alone,” he hissed. “So brave you were… So foolish!” he snapped, rising to his feet.

“You almost got yourself killed, you idiot. Do you not remember? If I was not there to save you, they would have renamed you the boy-who-was-stupid-enough-to-get-himself-killed!”

Harry’s leg twitched. He was fighting the body-binding curse!

“Did you honestly think that your anger was enough to defeat him? It wasn’t!” Severus broke eye contact and began pacing. He stopped short and glared down at Harry. “All you had to do was give your body to me – was that too much to ask? Having a solid status in the wizarding world doesn’t matter to me anymore. Being married to the saviour doesn’t matter.” Snape leaned over Harry. “All I want now is you. Body and soul.”

Harry’s eyes narrowed but Snape didn’t see it. He had already turned away.

“I’m even willing to share you just to make you happy,” he whispered. “With Malfoy or even,” Snape paused to look over his shoulder. “Miss Weas-...”

“EXPELLIARMUS!”

Snape flew six feet in the air and landed with a crack against a stone figurine.

“How DARE you speak her name!” Harry shouted, standing tall and free of the curse. Snape tried to pull himself up. “EXPELLIARMUS!”

Snape's breath stopped as his head slammed against the wall. He slid down, leaving a bloody trail.

“Don’t you EVER mention her again! EVER!”

Snape wearily looked up.

“CRUCIO!”

Snape howled as his body spasmed under the Unforgivable Curse and his arms and legs flayed wildly like a fish deprived of water. His head shook side to side and blood flew out of his mouth. Snape's eyes rolled in the back of his head and Harry finally released him. Snape continued to twitch and instantly began coughing up blood.

“Did you think I was going to sit by and watch you ruin my life?” Harry screamed. “And now you want my SOUL?” He approached Snape, wand still at the ready. “Well you can bloody well have it because it’s already dead! You killed it!”

Snape's body instinctively curled within itself as he continued to cough. His eyes fluttered open but everything was one giant blur. He tried blinking to focus, but couldn’t see through the thick pool of tears. Snape tried to shake off the pain in his head, having being exposed to this particular curse before, but the intensity of this one was different. It was stronger. Stronger than he had ever experienced. The boy was powerful. For the first time, Snape could feel death’s presence.

Snape mentally examined his body. A few broken ribs. Possibly a ruptured spleen. And definitely a concussion. His eyes locked with a smug-looking Harry Potter standing a few feet away. Harry crouched down and smirked.

“So, Severus,” Harry said calmly. “Still think I’m not ready?” He looked up and down Snape's body. “Not sure about you, but I know I am.”

Harry slowly rose to his feet and turned, walking away.

“Now. There’s only one thing left to do.” Harry spun around, wand pointing at Severus’ heart.

“AVADA KED-…”

“EXPELLIARMUS!” shouted three voices at once.

Harry flew eight feet back as if a cannonball had hit him in the chest. Several loud snaps were heard as he struck the cold stone wall. Harry’s body crumpled to the ground, landing in pile of pulverized flesh. Two figures stood over his body - wands still raised - and the third that was still bunched up against the far wall lowered his.

Unconscious and brutalized, Harry Potter was miraculously still alive.


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Chapter Twenty Nine



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